Sleep · 4 min read
Sleep anxiety: what to do when you are afraid of not falling asleep
TL;DR. Sleep anxiety is worry about sleep itself: will I fall asleep, will I cope tomorrow. The worry raises alertness, and alertness makes sleep harder. That feeds the worry. The way out is not to try harder to sleep. It is to take pressure off, keep a steady rhythm and count rest as useful even when sleep is slow.
How the fear keeps you awake
Researchers describe a loop. You worry about sleep, you watch the clock, you check how you feel, and you try to control sleep. All this raises arousal and makes sleep less likely (Harvey 2002). One bad night can turn into dread of the next.
Sleep cannot be forced. It tends to come when pressure is low and the body is ready.
Five steps
1. Turn the clock away
Checking the time adds sums: "only four hours left". Face the clock to the wall or hide the phone. Use an alarm and nothing else.
2. Change the aim
Swap "I must sleep" for "I will rest". Lying quietly with your eyes closed still restores some energy. This is not a trick. It lowers the stakes.
3. Keep a steady rhythm
Get up at the same time every day, even after a poor night. Plan a window that fits your real sleep. The free sleep window calculator can help you find a start. Do not make the window shorter than about five hours without a professional.
Limiting your time in bed, or leaving bed when you cannot sleep (step 5), is not safe for everyone. If you have bipolar disorder or epilepsy, or you snore and wake gasping, read the "Who should be careful" box on this page before you try steps 3 and 5.
4. Build a wind-down of 30 minutes
Dim the lights. Do something quiet: a shower, stretching, light reading. Leave tomorrow's problems for the morning. Write a short to-do list if they keep coming, or put them into the free worry-time planner.
5. Leave the bed if you are wide awake
After about 20 minutes of lying awake and tense, get up. Sit in dim light and do something calm. Go back when sleepy.
What not to do
- Do not make up for lost sleep with long naps or lie-ins. They can weaken the next night.
- Do not turn on bright screens or the news.
- Do not rely on alcohol. It may help you drop off, but it often breaks sleep later in the night.
- Do not start, change or stop sleeping pills on your own. Ask a doctor.
If your worry is about the night in general, read Can't sleep? What to do. For early wakings, see Waking up at 3 a.m.. If the thoughts race rather than dread, read How to stop racing thoughts at night.
Free tool
To plan a steady schedule, use the free sleep window calculator. It helps you set a window that matches how much you actually sleep.
When to seek help
Please talk to a doctor or psychologist if:
- trouble sleeping happens at least three nights a week and has lasted about three months;
- daytime sleepiness affects driving or work, or you snore loudly and wake up gasping;
- you have bipolar disorder, epilepsy or another condition where changing sleep can be risky;
- you feel low for weeks, or thoughts of harming yourself appear.
If you are in danger or thinking about harming yourself, contact emergency services or a crisis line now. These lines are free and confidential:
Free, confidential crisis lines by country are listed in the box below. See the crisis lines ↓
More options are on our Get help page.
FAQ
Is fear of not sleeping common?
Yes. After a few poor nights many people start to dread bedtime. It is a well-known pattern, not a sign of weakness.
Does one bad night harm my health?
A single poor night is unpleasant but usually manageable. The worry itself often does more harm than one night. If the bad nights follow a hard stretch of stress, see How to fix your sleep after stress.
When is professional help the next step?
If the problem lasts around three months, or affects your days, a professional can guide you through CBT-I, a structured behavioural programme for sleep. Guidelines recommend behavioural methods like this for chronic insomnia, and the ACP guideline puts them ahead of medication (Qaseem 2016; Edinger 2021).
Should I take a sleeping pill?
That is a question for your doctor. Guidelines suggest starting with behavioural methods in most cases.
Sources
- Harvey AG. A cognitive model of insomnia. Behav Res Ther 2002
- Edinger JD et al. Behavioral and psychological treatments for chronic insomnia disorder in adults: an AASM clinical practice guideline. J Clin Sleep Med 2021
- Qaseem A et al. Management of chronic insomnia disorder in adults: a clinical practice guideline from the ACP. Ann Intern Med 2016
Read next
- Can't sleep? What to do when your mind won't switch offLying awake with a racing mind? What to do tonight: when to get up, how to park the thoughts, what makes it worse — and when bad nights become a pattern.
- How to fix your sleep after a stressful period: 7 steps for the first two weeksSleep fell apart after stress: slow to fall asleep, waking at night. Why it happens and seven steps that help bring steady sleep back gradually.
- Revenge bedtime procrastination: why you stay up late and how to get your evening backStaying up late because the night is the only time that is yours? Why it happens and 5 steps to protect both free time and sleep.
- Waking up at 3 a.m. and can't fall back asleep: why it happens and what to doWaking at 3–4 a.m. and lying awake? Why it happens, what to do right now, what to avoid in the night and what to change in the day to wake less often.
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